But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I feel like a drive thru vagina
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Randomize
