It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
