white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
