did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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