There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
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