oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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