I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
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