check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
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