I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
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