Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
