just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Randomize