return my video game
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize