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We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Dicks are not precious.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize