If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
well you can't waste a boner
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
