Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
