We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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