Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
