batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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