I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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