i think my tv is drunk
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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