You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Randomize
