She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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