I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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