apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
