it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
