I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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