Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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