is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Randomize