Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
this just has baby written all over it
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
