her vagine was all disorganized.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Randomize