For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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