Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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