she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
My vagina is very pro this idea
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
