reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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