Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
A+ Viking dick
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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