so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
if i died would you start the facebook group?
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
