Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I think my nap took me to another dimension
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Randomize
