i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Randomize
