He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
