He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
