let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
