I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
