i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
