im gay
i know
yea but for you.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I have aggressive nipples.
Randomize
