I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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