So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Randomize
