if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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