weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
