So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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