he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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